I think my biggest problem in life is that I’m too accepting. Anyone that I spend a significant amount of time with automatically gets the name, Friend. Another fault is that I assume that other people are somewhat like me in this fashion and get disappointed when they aren’t.
How do you know when someone deserves the title or introduction of friend? Is it only when they would call you the same? Is it sort of like that precarious dance with the “L word” in a relationship? I never thought that I would struggle with the “F word” in this way! Maybe there are clues all along the way, like when someone calls you their “Neighbor” to define their relationship to you despite the fact that you are only “Neighbors” because you were first “Friends”.
I’m just looking for a few definitions of friends, not the Webster’s type of definitions. I want raw statements about what a friend is. Sometimes I can come about a definition of what a friend is by going into what a friend isn’t.
- Isn’t ever fake with you. Perhaps with other people but never with you. No matter how close you are or aren’t, if they call themselves your friend they don’t ever pretend with you.
- Isn’t someone whose actions make you sob yourself to sleep or lose sleep because you are tossing and turning.
- Doesn’t come between you and your husband or between you and your other friends.
- Never lies to you or about you.
Okay Internets, I am convinced that between my list of Isn’ts/Doesn’ts/Nevers and anything that you tell me will help me figure out the relationships in my life. If you would rather directly write me rather than comment, please do so but comments are welcome. They may help other people.